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Writer's pictureMichaela Kozlik

Breath by Breath: Your Brainstem's Dance of Healing




Deep within your skull, nestled like a watchful guardian at the base of your brain, sits one of the most ancient and powerful parts of your nervous system - the brainstem. While we're often captivated by the cerebral cortex's intellectual prowess, today I invite you to journey with me into this primal command center that quite literally keeps us alive and, as we're discovering, plays a crucial role in healing from trauma.


The Breath Master


Think of your brainstem as the world's most reliable DJ, constantly mixing the perfect rhythm of your breath. This isn't just any playlist - it's the soundtrack of your existence. Within the brainstem's medulla oblongata lies the respiratory control center, orchestrating a symphony of inhales and exhales that you've never had to consciously conduct.


But here's where it gets fascinating: this ancient conductor doesn't just keep the beat - it's constantly reading the room. It samples your blood's pH levels, measures oxygen and carbon dioxide concentrations, and adjusts your breathing rhythm accordingly. All of this happens while you're debating what to have for lunch or rushing to meet a deadline.


When Trauma Enters the Scene


Now, imagine your brainstem as a hypervigilant security guard. When trauma occurs, this guard goes into overdrive. It maintains its heightened state, keeping your body primed for danger long after the threat has passed.


This is where the plot thickens. Your brainstem's role in trauma isn't just about triggering fight-or-flight responses - it's intimately connected to your breath patterns. Have you ever noticed how anxiety makes your breathing shallow? That's your brainstem's emergency protocol in action.


The Healing Dance


But here's the beautiful twist in our story: the same system that can keep us locked in trauma's grip can also be the key to our liberation. Your brainstem's control over breathing gives us a direct line to the nervous system's control panel. When we consciously work with our breath - whether through deep breathing exercises, mindfulness practices, or somatic experiencing - we're essentially sending friendly signals to our vigilant brainstem guard: "Hey there, it's safe to relax now. We've got this."


The Science Behind the Story


Let's get a bit technical (but keep it friendly): your brainstem houses something called the reticular activating system (RAS). Think of it as your body's arousal dial. Through conscious breathing, we can actually turn this dial down, helping to regulate the fight-flight-freeze response that trauma can leave stuck on "high."


The vagus nerve, running right through your brainstem, is like a two-way street between your brain and body. By working with breath, we can send calming traffic down this neural highway, helping to restore balance to our system.


Breath and Trauma: Why Breathing Can Feel Unsettling


Breath can seem simple, but for trauma survivors, focusing on the breath can feel anything but easy. Trauma often leaves us with patterns of shallow, rapid breathing, a rhythm set by the brainstem to keep us ready to react. These patterns may feel normal because they’re familiar, and disrupting them—even with a slow, deep breath—can feel deeply uncomfortable.


For many, focusing on the breath can initially stir up unsettling sensations and memories. Trauma survivors may experience:


Heightened awareness of the body, which can feel overwhelming, bringing physical sensations or emotions they may have disconnected from.

Unwanted memories as breathing deeply can stir the body’s stored experiences of trauma.

A sense of vulnerability because deep breathing invites relaxation, and for survivors, relaxation can feel too close to letting their guard down.


These responses are natural. The brainstem has learned that staying vigilant keeps us safe, and changing this pattern can feel as though we’re abandoning a form of protection. Acknowledging that breath may be challenging at first is part of the healing process, a compassionate reminder that the discomfort is temporary and that breath can gradually become a bridge to safety.


Your Personal Healing Journey


Here's what makes this knowledge so empowering: you don't need fancy equipment or a PhD in neuroscience to begin working with your brainstem's healing potential. Your breath is always with you, a built-in tool for nervous system regulation.


If breath feels overwhelming, it helps to start gently. Start small. Notice your breath without trying to change it. Feel how it naturally flows in and out. This simple awareness begins to build a new relationship with your brainstem. Gradual practice builds comfort and trust, inviting the brainstem to let go of survival’s grip, one breath at a time. Here are some gentle techniques that help ease into breathing:


1. Diaphragmatic Breathing (Belly Breathing)


Place a hand on your belly, feeling it rise and fall with each breath. By shifting focus to the lower belly, this practice activates the diaphragm and stimulates the vagus nerve—a pathway from the brainstem to the body’s relaxation response. Diaphragmatic breathing encourages the brainstem to step down from its guard gradually, signaling that it’s safe to relax. Start with short sessions, allowing your body to adapt.


2. Box Breathing


Imagine drawing a steady square with your breath: inhale for a count of four, hold for four, exhale for four, pause for four. This practice provides a structured rhythm, helping the brainstem find a safe, predictable pattern. With each box breath, you reinforce to your nervous system that you’re here, present, and grounded.


3. Soft Breaths with Extended Exhalation


Trauma survivors often feel more comfortable with short breaths. Start with gentle inhales and allow a slightly longer exhale—perhaps inhaling for a count of three and exhaling for a count of five. This lengthened exhale supports the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS), guiding the brainstem toward a calm state. Each extended exhale is an invitation to let go, gently releasing survival’s hold.


Breath as a Pathway in Therapy


When you sit in a therapy session, you bring more than words; you bring your body and all its memories. Trauma is not just an experience in the mind; it lives in the body, bound to the rhythms of breath and heartbeat. And because the brainstem stores these survival responses deep below conscious thought, the path to healing often starts in places beyond words.


Through breathing, therapy finds its way to these depths. Breath becomes a grounding point, a steady rhythm you can return to when difficult memories or emotions surface. Breath doesn’t demand understanding; it only asks you to be present, to notice, to feel. In the quiet space of breathing, you create a place of safety within, showing the brainstem that it’s okay to soften its grip, to loosen the constant vigilance, to rest.


Breath can be your anchor, offering you:


A sense of safety: Trauma makes it difficult to feel safe in your own body. Breathing practices provide a way back to groundedness, a sense of being at home in yourself.

Emotional steadiness: Breathing shifts the nervous system, helping you find calm when emotions feel intense or overwhelming.

Resilience and resilience-building: With each breath, you teach the brainstem to find a new baseline, gradually rewiring it to interpret the world with less fear, more ease.


The Bigger Picture


Understanding your brainstem's role in both breathing and trauma healing reveals a profound truth: our bodies are incredibly wise. The same ancient brain structures that keep us alive moment by moment also hold keys to our emotional healing and resilience.


This isn't just about breathing exercises or trauma recovery - it's about reclaiming your connection to your body's innate wisdom. Your brainstem, far from being just a primitive relay station, is a sophisticated interface between consciousness and physical being.


Moving Forward


As you continue your day after reading this, I invite you to pause occasionally and notice your breath. Feel the gentle rise and fall of your chest, the subtle expansion of your ribcage. In these moments of awareness, you're not just breathing - you're engaging in a dialogue with one of the most ancient and wise parts of your nervous system.


Healing isn't about forcing change or fighting against your body's protective mechanisms. It's about cultivating a relationship with these deep processes, understanding their language, and working with them rather than against them.


Your brainstem has been faithfully keeping you alive since before you took your first conscious breath. Now, with understanding and gentle attention, it can become an ally in your healing journey. Trust in this process, trust in your body's wisdom, and most importantly, trust in your capacity to heal.


Take a deep breath. Your brainstem knows exactly what to do with it.





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